O souls who are friends of Shri Krishna, the brother of Balram and the very ocean of nectar, infinite beauty, sweetness, virtue and tenderness! As is customary, let us begin by chanting the Lord’s name for some time, after which I will shed light on some spiritual subjects. All glories to Shri Radha Krishna!
Now, please listen to me very carefully as I speak. Every living being in the entire world is engaged in finding the answer to only one question. What is that question? Who am I? Who is Mine? That’s all. Who am I? You must surely be a bit surprised to hear this question, because doesn’t everyone know the answer? No. There are a few who do know. Maybe one amongst millions. So we also need to know.
The Vedas declare: Scriptural Verse, Kena Upanishad 2.5: “O humankind! It is vitally important to understand the answer to this question. If you do not understand it, you are bound to suffer great harm.” What harm? Scriptural Verse, Katha Upanishad 2.3.4. If you fail to understand the answer to this question, then? Sargeshu. For millions of eons, you will continue to suffer like this. Suffering. All kinds of suffering; many kinds of bondage. For instance, there are three kinds of miseries, five kinds of afflictions, five material sheaths, three kinds of bodies, three modes of maya, and three kinds of karm. Numerous kinds of physical and mental afflictions. Every kind of suffering. You will have to undergo these for millions of kalps. This human form will not always be available to us. How long is a kalp? One kalp is four billion, two hundred and ninety-four million, and eighty thousand years long. One kalp. This is known as one day of Brahma. And this is for millions of kalps! Not just one. The Vedas use the word sargeshu, which implies many. Yes, we need to know this.
Observe, in the world, there are two types of entities that can be seen: one is sentient, and one is insentient. Please pay attention to each and every word. There is no third entity to be seen or experienced anywhere. What are the insentient entities? Earth, water, fire. These are all inert, aren’t they? They have no power of knowledge. They have no consciousness. And those that are conscious? You see them all around you: humans, animals, birds, insects and so on. They are conscious. They move around, see, hear, smell, taste, touch, think and make decisions. So, ‘I’ must be one of these two entities: sentient or insentient. Who am ‘I’? Because there is no third entity.
So, as long as someone is alive, he is referred to as a human. He may be called Ramdev. But when he dies, then what do we say? “Ramdev has gone.” His body is here. All his physical senses are still here. “Yes, we can see this.” Then who has left? The conscious entity has left, and the insentient part remains. This means we are two entities. One is the conscious ‘I’ and one is the lifeless ‘I’. In other words, the body is lifeless and there is something conscious within it. While that thing is in the body, the body is conscious, and obviously so is the thing itself. And when it leaves, the body becomes lifeless. In other words, it returns to its original state. The body gives us this knowledge: “Look! Until now, you believed that I was conscious. You fool! I am insentient!”
When Uddhav asked Lord Krishna, “Who is the greatest fool?” Lord Krishna replied: Scriptural Verse, Bhagavatam 11.19.42: “The greatest fool is the one who believes himself to be the body.” In spite of seeing the reality, we remain blind! Every day people are dying. The conscious entity leaves, and the lifeless entity is left behind. Yet we still don’t understand. Those who remain continue to accept their body as their true self. They consider the father of the body to be their father; the mother of the body to be their mother; the sons and daughters of the body to be their children, and their external property and possessions to be their own. They believe all of this. What is the proof? They cry when they are taken away. Why are you crying? “Someone of ‘mine’ died today.” “My father.” “My mother.” “My son.” “My husband.” Are they yours? Are you the body? “What else am I?” Oh I see, you are very wise!
So, we are such great fools that even though we see this day and night, we still believe that we are the body, when it is a fact that the body is lifeless. A conscious entity has entered this body. It is called jiva, the individual soul. What does jiva mean? That which itself is jivit (alive), and also gives life to another. The jiva itself is alive, and while it is inside the body, it keeps the body alive. When the jiva departs, the body becomes lifeless. Inert. It rots away! And look! Amazingly, we even accept this fact. Now, no wife accepts that dead body as her husband. If she did, she would keep it at home. “Hey, where are you taking him?” – “To burn him.” “Are you crazy? How dare you burn my husband!” – “But ma’am, he is gone.” “Gone? He’s lying down right here!” People say that Kalidas was a fool. We are thousands of times more foolish. We see all of this.
Understand this in layman’s terms. Let’s say there is a room that is completely dark. We bring a lamp from outside, light it and place it in the room. The lamp itself is light, and it also lights up the room. We take the lamp and put it in another room. Then? The room becomes dark again. In the same way, the soul comes from outside and enters the body, in the mother’s womb. It comes and then it leaves. “So, that means that which left the body, which passed away – in other words the one that left the body – that is the real ‘I’.” “So, now I understand!” No, you haven’t! Even that is not the ‘I’. Why? Because when the individual soul leaves the body, it does not go alone.
Scriptural Verse, Kaushitaki Upanishad 3.4. The individual soul takes the senses, mind, intellect and body along with it. “The body? The senses? Are you in your right mind? We can clearly see the body lying right here along with all the physical senses.” There is also a subtle body. We have three bodies. This is the sthul sharir (gross material body). Then there is a sukshma sharir (subtle body) as well as a karan sharir (causal body). So, the jiva first acquires the subtle body which includes the senses, the mind and the intellect.
“What you are saying doesn’t seem to make sense.” Alright, I will help you understand. You all sleep, don’t you? And you have dreams? So, when you dream, your body and senses are all lying on the bed, aren’t they? But in your dreams, you leave the bed and go to England, America, Canada, the sky and even the underworld. “Yes, I do.” How do you go there? Do you also see in your dreams? “Absolutely, just like I’m seeing now.” Do you hear too? “Yes, yes.” You even eat rasgulla (an Indian sweet) sometimes? “Yes, yes.” And you even get beaten sometimes? “Oh yes, quite badly beaten!” And sometimes do you even die in your dreams? “Yes, all of this!” So, where did you bring those senses from? Where did your mind go? Where did it reach? Your body is still right here. You did not die. You are still breathing. If someone shakes you, you react. “Why did you wake me up?” Therefore, when we depart from the body, the subtle body, senses, mind and intellect also go with us. Therefore, what leaves the body is not the ‘I’ alone.
Then who is the ‘I’? When the complete dissolution of the universe occurs, even the subtle body does not accompany the soul because the subtle body is a product of material nature, of maya. The mind and the senses are all made of maya. Maya cannot enter the realm of God. The mayic domain exists only within the material world. Maya cannot enter the abode of God. Scriptural Verse, Bhagavatam 2.9.10. Scriptural Verse, Bhagavatam 2.2.17. Poor maya! How will she go there? She cannot even stand before God. Scriptural Verse, Bhagavatam 2.5.13. Scriptural Verse, Bhagavatam 2.7.47. Scriptural Verse, Bhagavatam 1.7.23. At the time of cosmic dissolution, in the causal ocean in God’s vast form, only the jiva, along with its past karmic impressions, enters into God, where it remains in a pending state. Not even the subtle body, the mind or intellect go there. So, in the causal ocean, the soul which enters into God at the time of universal dissolution – that is the ‘I’. All the rest that are below that – the subtle body along with the subtle senses, mind and intellect; the gross body, including its senses, mind and intellect – all of these are not the ‘I’. They are connected with the ‘I’, but they are not the ‘I’.
So, what exactly is the ‘I’? Understand this through common sense. That which is not mine is the ‘I’. Mine. “This is my house. Here is the deed.” Oh, I see. But you are not the house, are you? “Of course not, how could I be the house? This is my body.” Oh, okay. You are not the body, though? “How could I be the body if it is mine?” “My mind does not focus.” Yes, the mind is yours. You cannot be the mind. “My intellect is not working right now.” Whatever you refer to as ‘my’ or ‘mine’ obviously cannot be you, as it is in the possessive case. They belong to you. Whatever belongs to me is called mine. Clearly, anything that is mine is different from me. So, wherever you use the word ‘mine’, that is not you. When you take away everything that is ‘mine’, that is you, the ‘I’.
But what am ‘I’? How will we know? Whatever means of understanding we have are all subordinate to the ‘I’. In other words, they are material. The senses, mind and intellect are all that you have for understanding. You see, you think and then you decide. “This is a man.” “This is a woman.” We make decisions throughout the day. We see, hear, smell, taste, touch and then think. The senses alone will not accomplish anything. The mind steps in and does the thinking. Then the intellect takes over and makes a decision. Yes, this is how it works. However, all these are unable to understand even the material world. Then what to say of the soul which is divine? To this day, no one has ever been able to see it. Renowned scientists with all their assertions, and prestigious astronomers are looking at the Sun, at Mars and so on. But have they ever seen the soul? Everyone is sitting around, and the soul just leaves. Where did it leave from? It’s gone! The doctor says, “He’s gone.” The soul is so subtle that no one has been able to see it with any instrument, and no one ever will. So how will we know it? How will we examine it?
Even the most minute bacteria have bodies, but you don’t see them. You eat yoghurt every day? There are living creatures moving around in it. “Living creatures?” Yes, take a look through a microscope and you will see that it’s full of tiny creatures! Now you might find it disgusting to eat yoghurt. “I’m eating living creatures every day?” There are many living beings like this. Their bodies are so tiny that your eyes cannot see them. But there has never been, and never will be, any microscope in the world for the soul. Nor has there been any intellectual born in the world, and never will be, who could understand the soul with his intellect or his ideas. Ideas. Where there is smoke, there must be fire. This is called an idea (inference). Nyaya Darshan. But ideas will not work here, either through perception or inference. So, the third kind of evidence is scriptural evidence. Through scriptural evidence you will find out Who am I? Who is Mine?
What does scriptural evidence mean? Scriptural evidence means that evidence whose words cannot be doubted. For this, there are two sources. One is someone who has attained knowledge of the soul: one of our fellow beings, whom we call a Saint, a Mahatma or a divine personality. The other is the Supreme Power, God. These are the two personalities who know who the ‘I’ is. So, we should ask them. However, how do we know whether someone among us knows the truth? There can also be doubt here. There is so much hypocrisy in the world that even great intellectuals are deceived. Many learned people have been deceived, are being deceived and will be in the future. So, how can we have faith that they know the ‘I’? Therefore, we should stay away from them.
Then who will tell me who ‘I’ am? Scriptural evidence. This is of two kinds: the first kind is eternal, beginningless. The other has a beginning. The words of the Saints have a beginning. One day, the Vedant (i.e. Brahma Sutra) was created. One day, Sankhya was created. One day, Mimansa was created. One day, the Bhagavat was created. One day, the Ramayan was created. However, the Vedas are eternal, beginningless. anadi nidhana vedah. Even God did not create the Vedas. It is said that they are the word of God. Why? They emanated from the mouth of God. This is why we say they are the word of God. And ignorance cannot enter into God. I have told you that maya cannot stand in front of God, and ignorance is a consequence of maya. So, it is also said that the Vedas are vani, the word of God. But what is the fact? Scriptural Verse, Ramayan. God was lying in a state of deep sleep, and the Vedas manifested from His mouth, from His breath. Brahma emerged from His navel. The Vedas appeared before Brahma and said: “Read us. Understand us. And then create the universe.” Scriptural Verse, (Bhagavatam 2.9.5). Brahma spent thousands of years in deep meditation trying to do this, but he could not comprehend the Vedas, nor could he create the universe. Scriptural Verse, Bhagavatam 2.9.5. Then God bestowed His grace upon him. Scriptural Verse, (Bhagavatam 1.1.1). Seated within the heart of Brahma, God revealed the knowledge of the Vedas to him. Such are the words of the Vedas. They are eternal, everlasting and devoid of all faults, blemishes or doubts of any kind. The four faults inherent in humans are not found in the Vedas.
So, through the Vedas, we can determine ‘Who am I?’ without any doubt or uncertainty. The words of the Vedas are vinirgat, meaning ‘revealed’. There are three kinds of scriptures: Vinirgat Vani, Smrit Vani, and Krit Vani. The books written by souls who are governed by maya, and are based on their own ideas, are called Krit Vani. They may contain both correct and incorrect knowledge because these authors do not have perfect knowledge. They write based on their own ideas. Biographies of Saints written by those with material intellects are all incorrect. Why? They have no practical experience of that class. Yet here they are writing this and that about their Guru in their books. Their writings can never be correct. This is called Krit Granth. And Smrit Granth is that which is written by realised Saints who have complete knowledge, have attained God and have been liberated from maya for all eternity.
These Saints are far superior to even the self-contented, self-fulfilled, selfless Paramhansas. Paramhans is just a stage of sannyas or renounced life. A paramhans is not all-knowing. There are four types of sannyasis mentioned in the Ashrama Upanishad: kutichak, bahudak, hans and paramhans. There are six kinds of sannyasis mentioned in the Narada-parivrajaka Upanishad: kutichak, bahudak, hans, paramhans, turiyatit and avadhut. However, even the brahmagyani cannot be considered perfect, because the brahmagyani has only experienced the impersonal aspect of God. He has not experienced the nectar of the ever-sweet pastimes of God’s personal form. For this reason, he too cannot be considered perfect.
So, those who are perfect and write scriptures such as Veda Vyas who wrote the Bhagavat – the descension of God Himself – and Narad Ji who wrote the Narad Bhakti Sutra, the Pancharatra and more: these personalities are beyond doubt. They are Smrit Granth; but still we may have doubts. Our limited intellects are such that we even question God Himself. During Lord Ram’s descension, He was accused by a laundry-man. We all criticised Shri Krishna during His descension. “This flirt is always chasing after girls all day long, and he’s called God!” We were all there. Our minds are material, so what can we do? How could we know when we have not reached that stage? That understanding is so far beyond us, it’s like studying for a Master’s when we don’t even know the basic alphabet. And if we try to use our intellect, we will be completely ruined because we do not have the experience. Our understanding comes from a material intellect and senses, so we apply this reasoning to God as well.
Our first reaction is to feel anger within. We get so angry with someone that we even think of killing him. We don’t say anything. “I must kill him … but I could be hanged for it. Then let me be hanged, but I will definitely murder him!” The fire of anger grows until we become so enraged that our intellect stops functioning. Then we commit murder. We commit the greatest of sins. And telling lies is commonplace. It is a normal everyday affair. Along with that, we say, “I swear to you.” We say this too. “I swear on God! I swear on the Ganges!” This is what we say. The more we lie, the more we swear. “However, we have to do this to fulfil our own self-interest.” This is the excuse people give. “Sir, things just won’t work without lying. There would be so many quarrels and problems.” A husband was sitting and thinking negatively about his wife, and she asked, “What are you thinking?” – “Oh, I wasn’t thinking about anything.” “You must be thinking something.” – “Oh, I was just thinking about our son going to school and getting him a motorcycle.” See, he told a lie because if he had told the truth, there would be an uproar in the house! “Is that what you think about me? You have doubts about me?”
So, first we become angry. It keeps increasing until we end up hitting someone. But here is Arjun who killed thousands without any anger. Hanuman Ji killed hundreds of thousands of brahmins. He set Lanka on fire, yet he saw only Sita and Ram everywhere. “I cannot believe this. It is impossible!” Why? “I couldn’t do such a thing! So no one else must be able to either, whether it is God or anyone else!” This is why in every descension period that we have seen the pastimes of God or the Saints, instead of benefitting from them, we committed spiritual offences: the greatest of all sins. “He is worse than me. I am much better than Him.” This is our nature. We cannot understand. This is why we must take the support of the Vedas.
There also needs to be someone who understands the Vedas. So extraordinary are the Vedas. Scriptural Verse, Bhagavatam 11.3.44. What does this mean? In the Vedas, a word may be one thing and its meaning quite another. If you try to interpret the Vedas yourself with a dictionary, you won’t get anywhere. The Vedas use the word pran to refer to God. They also use the word akash, and the word jiva, and the word atma. These are all used for God! Now, if we try to interpret the meaning using a dictionary, everything will be misinterpreted. Scriptural Verse, (Bhagavatam 11.3.43). The Vedas are the form of God. Just as God is beyond the reach of the intellect, so are the Vedas. 11.3.43. Even the greatest yogis and sages cannot understand them. Scriptural Verse, (Bhagavatam 11.21.35). The Vedas are the form of Brahm (God). Just as God is beyond the grasp of the senses, mind and intellect, so are the Vedas. (Shatyayani Upanishad 4).
If you do not understand the Vedas, you will not understand ‘I’, nor will you understand ‘mine’. ‘Mine’. There is also ‘mine’, isn’t there? I told you there are two. One is ‘I’ and one is ‘mine’. It is necessary to understand both. Who am I? Who is Mine? So, the knowledge of ‘I’ and ‘mine’, being divine, cannot be understood through material means. Pay attention to each and every word. There are no material instruments or material means to understand the divine subject of ‘I’ or ‘mine’, meaning God. It is impossible! Therefore, only through scriptural evidence can we attain true knowledge of the ‘I’. Otherwise, we will continue to speak of and accept the ‘mine’ as the ‘I’.
Even the greatest intellectuals do this. What do we say every day? “Who are you? Introduce yourself.” – “Don’t you know who I am? I am the collector of Pratapgarh.” “Collector? I’m not asking about your profession. I am asking you who you are.” – “I am Jagdish Prasad.” “This is just your name, sir.” – “Okay, I am a man, what else?” “Man? That is just the name of the body. We are descendants of Manu. That’s why we are called man. This is ours or mine. I am not asking about what is yours. I am asking about you; who are you? The real you. Not what belongs to you. The body is yours. You keep introducing your body. Tell me who you are. You don’t know, do you? Well then, you should be in a mental asylum!” – “What nonsense are you speaking?” “I am not speaking nonsense, sir. I am just telling you.” We are already in a mental asylum! This whole world is God’s mental asylum. For all those who do not know who they are, God has created this huge mental asylum through maya. If you tell an insane person in an asylum in the world, “You are mad”, he will laugh and reply, “Yes, I understand. You’re the one who is mad!” He will call you mad.
Once, the first prime minister of our country, Pandit Nehru, visited a mental asylum to see how it was being run. When he entered the asylum, all the inmates were acting strangely. There was one inmate in charge of the others. Nehru called him over and asked, “You … what is your name?” The man told him his name. “Where do you live? What are your qualifications? What have you studied?” The man replied to all the questions properly. Nehru asked the warden, “Why have you locked this man up? He seems to be fine.” Now, that poor warden became scared, thinking, “I am surely going to lose my job! He’s asking me why I have locked up such a normal, sensible man!” Just then, the madman asked Pandit Nehru, “Who are you?” So, Nehru replied, “I am Pandit Nehru, the prime minister.” The man replied, “Ah I see, okay. You see that room across from here? The man in there calls himself Mahatma Gandhi. You should go and join him.” The warden said, “Do you see, sir? This is his kind of madness. He seems to be alright for a while and then he becomes mad again. You can call him half mad or three-quarters mad, but he is that kind of a madman.”
We are also like this. We also behave very properly at times. If anyone were to see you right now, what would they say? “No one here is mad. Everyone is worshipping God. They are singing and chanting. No one is thinking negatively about anyone else. No one is stealing from anyone. No one is telling lies. Look at them all together. These are all Saints sitting here.” But if someone here accidentally pushes someone else, then the real personality comes out! It was lying inside waiting for the slightest provocation as an excuse to come out. Then we immediately lose our minds.
Once a collector, commissioner or governor scolded his errand boy, “You come late every day!” He replied, “Please don’t mind, sir, but you come even later than I do.” His boss exclaimed, “Idiot! Rogue! Punish this boy! You dare to compare yourself with me? Are you equal to me?” – “But sir, you also get paid for working full-time, as I do.” Now, if any Jagadguru were to see this argument and ask, “Mr. Collector, why are you abusing him?” – “Look how stupid he is! He dares to tell me that I come late to work too.” “Well, what he said is right. What has he said that is incorrect? Tell me one thing, you are an I.A.S. officer? (Indian Administrative Service)” – “Yes.” “And this errand boy has only a basic education.” – “Yes.” “Then why do you think he would match you in capability? He is undoubtedly a fool. And a fool will obviously behave foolishly. So why are you surprised that he is a great fool? Do you expect the errand boy of an I.A.S. officer to be an I.A.S. officer? Then things would be equal!” The collector would have no answer to this. He would think, “Yes, it’s true that he is just a fool with a basic education; so he is likely to make mistakes. But I became angry! Why did I become a fool?”
We should only pretend to be angry; we should not actually become angry. We should only act lovingly with our mother, father, brother and everyone else. We should not love them! Love only the one who is truly yours. They are not yours; they belong to the body. That is all there is to it. So, we must understand through the Vedas: ‘Who am I?’ I will explain this some other time. All glories to Shri Radha Krishna!
